Moving On
by starbelow
Summary: Zoe is trying to move on, but she finds herself in the arms of the man she had feelings for before Wash came aboard Serenity. MalZoe pairing. Oneshot.


**_A/N Disclaimer: I own NOTHING. Joss is Boss._** This is just a small fic that I did to entertain myself in math class. It's my first MalZoe pairing!! Hope you guys like it.

Zoe stood behind Mal in the worn out pilot's chair.

_'That's where Wash sat'_

A small stroke of sadness slithered in her heart. He had meant a little, if not a lot, to her and he had helped her get through the most difficult time in her life.

Mal looked comfortable, a little too comfortable, in that chair. He was leaning back with one hand on the control and the other hand flicking switches and turning knobs on the lit up board.

He was angry and ranting to her about some incident with Jayne and the rat they called Badger.

"He made us stay there til he was done countin' the coin. As if he'd thought we'd cheated'em." He turned his chocolate brown eyes to the woman listening quietly to his rambling. "An' we all know how Jayne gets when there's allota coin in one place, specially when it ain't his."

Zoe chuckled at the thought of Jayne trying to get his hands on Badger's money.

"Yeah," Mal grinned. His thin lips pulled to one corner slightly revealing the softer side of the captain for only a moment.

Zoe watched his animated face as Mal explained what occurred while finishing off the last job. She was so accustomed to his angry fits of rage and his nearly , endless rants. These two traits were a part of him as surely as his suspenders and Serenity were a part of him.

Zoe leaned back against the wall and watched as Mal's soft brown hair fell into his eyes. It was getting a little too long to suit him properly. She fought the urge to brush the stray locks away. She pinned her hands between her body and the cold wall to resist reaching out to him.

"...I was 'bout ready to kill that hwoon dahn, but instead I did one of those breathy things Simon's always doin' to calm his nerves. Ya know, countin' to ten, and it worked. Instead of killin'em, I jus' shot'em in the knee..."

_'Wash would have made some sill remark to make us all laugh.'_ The thoughts surfaced in her mind_. 'But Wash is dead, he's gone, and Mal is here. Mal is always here.'_

"Zoe, ya shoulda been there. Ya would've died laughin' when seein' Jayne's expression. It was priceless." His angry mood was interrupted with a bark of laughter and a growing smile on his face.

She could feel the contagiousness of his momentary happiness as a smile spread to her lips as well.

_'He's always there and I've always followed his lead without question. He's always taken care of me and we've been through everything together. The war, the jobs, Miranda, Wash's death, Book's death, Inara - '_

"Zoe, could ya believe that he wanted to give us a bag of medicines to sell for profit instead of coin for payment? Ya can't replace somethin' of great value with somethin' of lesser value. It just ain't done."

_'But it was done.'_ Zoe couldn't bear to look at Mal. A flood of shameful thoughts, memories, and feelings filled her head. Her brown guarded eyes looked out into the Black. The never ending Black. _'I've done it. During the battle on Serenity I've...I had feelings for you. Wrong feelings I should have never entertained. By the end of the war I'd grown so fond of you that I couldn't bare to be without you, Mal. And it seemed like you felt the same way. You bought this ship and swore to me that we'd always be together and that we'd go any and everywhere we wanted.'_

Zoe pushed away from the wall. The captain was still talking but she couldn't hear what he was saying, she was so lost in her own head.

_'Then everything changed. It happened so fast. We took on Wash, Inara, and traded our useless engineer for Kaylee. With more people 'round, we got to spend less and less time with just the two of us. When you started hangin' round Inara's shuttle things began to change a lot more...b'tween us. You were busy arguin' with her and to avoid the jealous thoughts that popped into my head whenever I was alone an' wantin' your company, I'd be at the controls with Wash.'_

"Hell, next time I see that hwoon dahn I'll kill'em." Mal grumbled. "I'll cut off his greedy lil' hands an' kill'em." An devious chuckle came from his direction.

_'Wash made me laugh, he distracted me from thoughts of you, even though he didn't know it. He helped me more thank he'd ever realize. He liked me and he was kinda cute, sure he wasn't anythin' like you, but he was cute enough. We hooked up a few times, I told him I was in love with him when I wasn't and we got hitched. If it phased you I never saw that it did. He was the next best thing and he was good to me. He was good for me. I tried to let Wash fill the void in my heart that you created, but he could only do so much. After all he was not Malcolm Reynolds. There's nothing like the original. But Wash is gone now and Inara's left Serenity. There's no one to get in the way now. I'll only play the weeping widow for so long.'_

She heard Mal's footsteps before she realized he was walking towards her. He wrapped his strong arms around her, as if he had done it all his life, and pulled her into a hug.

"Ya can talk to me if ya want." Mal murmured awkwardly into Zoe's ear. His warm breath tickled her dark skin. "I know that some days will be worse than others and some days will be better than others."

"I wanna to tell you so much, but..." Zoe curled her arms around his and held him closer. She buried her face into his neck.

"But nothin'. We can get through this together."

"Together?" She lifted her head at the word looked up into his familiar brown eyes. They felt like home.

"Ai ya, Zoe, of course." He caressed her hair and laid her head back on his shoulder. "Bao bei yer like my other half. When yer sad, I'm...well, ya know the rest."

_'I thought his feelings for me had died. Maybe I'm just imagining that they've resurfaced.'_

"Your other half?" Zoe inquired. The words trickled out of her mouth uncertainly.

"No more "sir" Zoe. I've been tryin' to getcha to call me Mal for years."

"Sorry sir, yessir."

"What am I gonna to do with ya?" Mal laughed softly in her ear. The sound vibrated throughout Zoe's bones.

"What would you want to do?" She replied with a voice she usually reserved for Wash. It was scheming and husky.

Mal slowly released from their embrace and looked into her face. Zoe stood against the wall terrified and embarrassed. Her fingers became damp with sweat and she could feel her body heat rising to the degree of a thousand suns.

"I want to do this." He leaned towards her, trapping her against the wall, and lightly brushed his lips against hers. It was soft and sweet. Mal leaned in again and kissed her long and hard.

Their lips melted together, their tongues ventured into each others mouths and they licked up the taste of one another. Mal was the first to pull away.

"I know yer sad, but I'm thinkin' it's time to for ya to move on."

Zoe gently pecked his lips with a kiss.

"Yessir."

**TRANSLATION:**

Hwoon dahn: Son of a bitch

Ai ya: Damn

Bao bei: Darling


End file.
